Forgiveness Is like Mercy
Relief Society General Conference
Assembly Hall, Temple Square, Salt Lake City, Utah
Thursday, April 3, 1924
Many splendid lessons have been given during this conference, and I am sure many resolutions have been renewed with the effect that we shall be better leaders, better pace-setters in our different communities, more sympathetic sisters, more devoted wives, and more understanding mothers.
The group assembled here today belongs to the class of women who have no time to be idle, no time to indulge in those things which we have been taught are a waste of time and not conducive to advancement. Our aim is to serve and in that service find joy in this life, and eternal life in the world to come.
Along the path of life that leads to happiness are many pitfalls which must be avoided if we reach our goal. One of these pitfalls I shall call unforgiveness. By it stands a little mound of forgiveness which, if mounted, will lift us above the petty things of life to see a bigger, broader plain and a well-defined path.
There are many actions of men and women of which we do not approve, take part in, or sanction, and while it is our mission to do all we can in the spirit of real charity and sisterly love to show the better way, the more perfect plan of peace, we need not hate our fellow beings because their ways are not ours. We must let our Father judge them.
The word of the Lord through the Prophet Joseph Smith, recorded in the Doctrine and Covenants, says, “I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men, and ye ought to say in your hearts, ‘Let God judge between me and thee according to thy deeds.’”12
I heard the other day of a woman who lived on the same street as her father and yet she had not spoken to him for many years. I heard also a Relief Society president who, upon learning that one of the members of the society was offended because of some action on the part of the presidency of the Relief Society, went to the home of this sister and tried to talk matters over, to apologize, if necessary, and make things right, but this sister could find no place in her heart for forgiveness and so the president turned away sorrowing for that sister. Which of the two women would be happiest today? My father has often said: “Hate hurts the hater worse than the hated.”13
Peter, on one occasion, said to Jesus, “How oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times?” And Jesus said unto him, “I say not unto thee until seven times, but until seventy times seven.” Then he said, “Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king, which would take account of his servants, and one was brought unto him which owed him ten thousand talents, but forasmuch as he had not to pay, his lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife, and children, and all that he had, and payment to be made. The servant, therefore, fell down and worshiped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee all. Then the Lord of that servant was moved with compassion, and loosed him and forgave him the debt.
“But the same servant went out, and found one of his fellow-servants which owed him an hundred pence; and he laid hands on him, and took him by the throat, saying, Pay me that thou owest. And his fellow-servant fell down at his feet and besought him, saying, Have patience with me, and I will pay thee all. And he would not; but went and cast him into prison.
“So when his fellow-servants saw what was done, they were very sorry and came and told unto their lord all that was done. Then the lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt because thou desiredst me: Shouldst not thou also have had compassion on thy fellow-servant, even as I had pity on thee? And his lord was wroth, and delivered him unto the tormentors till he should pay all that was due unto him. So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brothers their trespasses.”14
Is it not a truth that Jesus taught us to pray: Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive them that trespass against us?15
Martin Luther commenting on this said, “When thou sayest, ‘I will not forgive,’ and stand before God with your paternoster, and mumblest, ‘Forgive us our debts,’ it is the same as saying, ‘I do not forgive him, so do not thou, God, forgive me.’”16
In our homes let us not hold grudges one toward another, but seek and pray daily to find a way to forgive one another, remembering that forgiveness is like mercy, “It is twice blessed, it blesses him that gives and him that receives.”17 If we could become as little children in this particular how much happier we would be, for whoever knew a little child who was not willing to forgive at the very first intimation of regret on the part of the offender; yes, and even before any repentance was shown on the part of the one who committed the offense. Did not God say, “Except ye become as little children ye can in no wise enter the kingdom of God”?18
To those who have been sorely tried and bitterly offended, remember it requires a prayerful, generous, and merciful heart coupled with a strong will to forgive, but remember also, an unforgiving heart places a barrier between itself and God’s forgiveness, for is it not written, “He that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses, standeth condemned before the Lord, for there remaineth in him the greater sin.”19
So let us each and all bury our grievances whether they pertain to our immediate family, our church, or our neighbor, and cover this pitfall that deprives us of happiness with a slab of forgetfulness and forgive as we hope to be forgiven.